JEDDAH: Fatima is a 30-year-old Saudi woman who suffers from polio. She has never been married and spends her time working for a charitable organization.

"It isn't easy to have special needs and get married. It's socially difficult and sometimes painful," said Fatima. Many people have a very limited view of disabled people, she explained.

Fatima said she is judged on the basis of her physical appearance and deemed unfit to marry, have children or be an active member of society. "They should know that not all disabled people are crippled. Disabilities vary from one person to another," she added.

Marriage for people with special needs is a contentious issue in Saudi society. Parents are typically responsible for the care of a mentally disabled child. Therefore, marriage is perhaps seen as the only way of securing care, love and attention after they die.

However, there are questions regarding whether the mentally disabled should be allowed to marry partners that are able-bodied and also whether they are capable of being husbands, wives and parents.

Fatima said that it is preferable for a disabled person to marry disabled people. However, they must be able to complement each other so that they can manage their marriage without outside help.

"Even though life would be tough for them, they ought to be given the choice to marry or not," she said.

There are no official statistics on the number of marriages involving disabled people in the Kingdom. Noura Al-Asheikh, general director of women's issues at the Ministry of Social Affairs in Makkah, confirmed the lack of statistics and said that such marriages are considered to be a confidential family matter.

"There is a high rate of marriages involving men and women who are deaf or hard of hearing based on personal observations. I also know of many physically disabled people who are happily married and have big families. It all boils down to the disabled family's support," said Al-Asheikh.

There are many cases of mentally disabled people who are successfully married.

Mohsin has been in a government job for four years and is happily married with three children. Others, such as Aisha (not her real name) have not been so lucky. A mentally handicapped woman, she has been married four times, each time ending in divorce and a baby.

Rehabilitation consultant for the mentally disabled Shadia Al-Masri said that with the mentally disabled at particular risk from abuse, marriage is a means of protection from the evils of society.

"Marrying a mentally handicapped person is a form of charity in itself and there are many successful marriages.

In Germany, the mentally handicapped get married in special camps under the watchful eyes of specialists who help and guide them," she said.

She stressed the importance of increasing awareness among parents about the best ways of dealing with mentally handicapped children so they do not become isolated from society.

Marriage official Sheikh Ahmad Al-Maabi said there is nothing in Islam that prohibits marriages between healthy and mentally handicapped people as long as couples agree to carry out their marital duties.

>> Shaadmaani.Com Matrimonial Services >>

All Rights Reserved ©Copyright - 2007 - Shaadmaani.Com Matrimonial