Marriage, Wedding, Shaadi, Matrimony, whatever you call, it has become a business of profit for many a selfish and greedy Grooms and for his beloved parents. The old Urdu saying "Shaadi Khaana Aabaadi" meaning "Wedding helps establish an eternal and perpetual home" now has become a misnomer. The misogynistic move of the in-laws of the bride plays an extortionist part in the Matrimonial arrangements while bargaining with hard cash and household materials against the pride of their sons.

Thus the finely arranged Matrimonial niceties often derail causing countless virtual violence of a failed Marriage. Here the meaning of the excellent Marriage slogan "Shaadi Khaana Aabaadi" gets lost in the cold winds of hatred and abhorrence.

Let me narrate a Marriage or Shaadi Proposal here showing the twists and turns it takes till this proposal gets shaped in to a lovely wedding :

A handsome, well qualified potential Groom aspirant of a Marriage bond with a lovely blonde of his dream registers his name with a Marriage Bureau or Matrimonial Website. He does so with a great hope to have a girl of his choice. He is generally from a well respected family, with plenty of relatives and friends around him to make him so important and beloved one. Many of his friends, relatives and neighbors advises him according to their experience and makes this gentle and nice groom to realize that he is something special who is worth of an amount to the tune of billion or trillion. They instigate him to put forward his demands for getting married.

All the beauty, education, talents and homeliness a girl possesses bear no meaning to these money-minded Grooms. Nor do they have a heart to think of the plight of the parents of the girl who simply undergo pressure of Matrimonial demands in the name of dowry. Shaadi (wedding) becomes really a monetary barbaadi (disaster) to the family of the girl.

Somehow, on a fine day, a few well bloomed and well cultured brides or their parents select this ostensible gentleman through the Marriage Bureau or Matrimonial Website of their choice for a preliminary contact. A ray of hope for the Bliss of Matrimony shines bright to them. On completion of the preliminary enquiries generally the parents of the girl hasten for the marriage of their daughter and invite the groom and/or his parents to take the dialogue and planning of wedding to a further closer point of the Matrimonial Bliss.

After selection of the Bride based on her personal appearance, while displaying a sense of pride and superiority the Groom and his responsible parents along with their relatives put forward a list of dowry in the shape of money and material. To the shock and dismay of the gullible Bride the condition of dowry put forward by these educated beggars surely comes as a curse for being born as a girl in this world. Her parents sigh with heavy hearts and feel small for giving birth to a girl child and fostering her to this day only to see their inability to meet the unjust, unjustified and exorbitant demands. For the first time they start realizing the necessity of not being the parents to a girl child.

Fully indebted monetarily or accumulating everything by acquiring the sales proceeds of their ancestral property or any other property obtained out of their own life long savings, the hapless parents half-heartedly approve the unjust alms begging practice of the Groom and his parents, in order to meet the Matrimonial Demands of dowry.

The much awaited marriage, a dream wedding, a sweet Shaadi, a Nikah according to Sharia, a Muhurtam on an auspicious day gets accomplished with full of blessings from everyone involved. Thus the "Shaadi Khaana Aabaadi" gets embarked on the voyage of a long life.

Naeem Syed is the Founder And CEO of Shaadmaani.Com. A Social Worker And Responsible Citizen of India, Naeem Syed has a couple of Websites for the benefit of Citizens of this world. He writes on Social Issues and Cultures. Naeem Syed may be contacted at http://www.Shaadmaani.Com
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